How to survive Childhood.

I cannot reveal much but my absence from the world of blogging has something to do with an elephant and an evil eye. Ya? Moving on. My Boy has started his preschool and of course being so mollycoddled he cried for a few days until he realized that I am not  going to go anywhere and would be back in couple of hours while he enjoys at the  expense of his teacher so now he goes in all happy and comes out feeling all important.

Well now that he has started preschool, I am constantly reminded of my own days. Don’t we all wish that we could somehow go back in life and relive our childhood. Well, me for sure don’t. Even though I am fortunate enough to have had a normal childhood with expecting parents and bullying sibling. But somehow the whole concept of childhood seems so overrated!

I remember walking home from school with the burden of my  bag pushing me down towards the ground. No it weren’t just the million text books but majorly the one mark sheet hidden among the humongous piles of books, you know those types which needs to get your parents signature. The others were usually buried by me at the far end of the school playground. See I have always believed in giving it back to the society.

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My advice: Always remember ‘this too shall pass!’ and also remember to  take out the lunch box in time.  Because the chances of the mark sheet landing in your mom’s hand instead of the lunch box greatly increases during such already trying days.

And then that waking up early for school, home works, tests, limited play time, Bullies, bad teachers, worse food options, no creative freedom, no freedom at all.

Here are a few tips and tricks to survive childhood.

Be the pet your teacher always wanted: Bring her handmade cards,  volunteer to carry her stuff around and be her beast of burden, compliment her, Never question her or ask her intelligent questions and remember to humor her.

No use crying over spilled milk, cry before it gets noticed. Cry before the teacher asks you the reason for not doing the homework, cry before your father picks up his gold- plated- inheritance worthy pen reduced to a piece of junk, cry before your mother notices her expensive carpet stained, cry before your bully brother punches you in your face. You get the hang? It helps most of the time.

Stay calm and pray

Pray for the teacher to fall sick. Pray that your mum doesn’t give you a bad haircut. Pray that you get a set of sensitive and considerate parents or you might just get stuck with a funny name for all your life. And above all pray that you be the kid who is neither too thin nor too fat, neither too dark nor too fair, neither too short nor too tall.

Because middle path is the best path.

Always remember childhood is short and you will never get it back. So yay! This too shall pass.

And if all else fail pretend to be the creepy child. It never fails.

O ya! This works.

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